2017 so far has brought on some particular challenges for me, and I’ve had troubles getting them into words. Part of it is that I don’t want people I know reading about them, and part of it is that I simply don’t know how to put it into words.
I began my profession, and for the first time in my life, I don’t come home and complain about my job for hours. In fact, I was unsure if I was fit to be a teacher. Everyone else seemed to know they were made to be a teacher by age 2, and there I was, switching my major for the last time at 21. I think it turned out for the best.
While things have been great professionally, my relationships with friends and family are falling apart. I’ve been thinking about the Reason, Season, Lifetime poem.
I’m thinking about my best friend who stopped talking to me because XYZ stupid reason. No fight. Except for me calling her bluff. I thought she’d be my maid of honor when I got married. She was my favorite friend to laugh with, she supported me through my toughest time in life so far. And her reason for not talking to me was…. really?? She was my friend for a season.
My friends from college who I laughed with in class, talked to daily and lifted me up when I felt down. I thought they felt the same way. Class is over, and I suppose now we have nothing in common. They were friends for a reason.
My family member who didn’t decided that me traveling with my boyfriend was unforgivable to her and God, and sent me hurtful words. She didn’t tell anyone about those hurtful words, but makes me out to be the villain when I won’t reach out anymore. They were in my life for a season.
My family member, who won’t reach out to me now that I am estranged. I have never felt more alienated, and I believe you were in my life for a season.
I’m moving to fulfil my life dreams in September. I’m scared to find out who else is in my life for season or a reason, but I have a good idea on who I can count on.
I do not like saying goodbye. But I will.